Are Your Parents fair?

Everyone argues with their parents when they are in their teenage years. These are the times when we want to branch off from being under the control of our parents and be our independent selves. We are tired of following the rules and tend to be a bit more rebellious. Most want to just move onto college as soon as possible have that freedom to just live our lives how we want to. When we move on in our lives is when you are being put to the test. The decisions you make when you are left alone reflect on who raised you. They shine through you even when you aren’t expecting it. The morals that have been nailed in your mind are now put to the test. Will you go crazy or be true to yourself? There are three types of parenting; authoritarian, authoritative, and permissive. How have your parents decided to raise you?

The authoritative approach is the strict side of parenting. The guardians tend to think that it is their way or the highway. If you were to question them on a situation they would respond with “because I said so” or “I’m the adult.” They typically have an earlier curfew if they even allow the child to go out. If the rules are broken there is a heavy consequence, which is implemented to try and get the desired results. They are very structured parents who mold their child into being a polite and sheltered child. Basically, they want the child to know that they are the boss and want them to obey their every command. This can make the child very responsible and a good person with excellent morals to live by as they grow older. This can also hurt the child by sheltering them, which may make it difficult for the kid to adapt to different uncomfortable situations when it’s older.

The permissive technique is very laid back. It is filled with very few rules to be followed; it’s almost as if the parents let the children do whatever he or she pleases. There is no curfew, no punishments for bad behavior, or any sort of structure. To the child they might like this a lot since they can pretty much do whatever they please. But this style of parenting doesn’t give them much of a back bone for life lessons and a sense of how the real world is. In life people can’t always just roam around and do what they want. They will have to listen to someone else and take orders from someone if they are in the work environment. Children who have been brought up in the permissive way of life may not respond well to punishment or not getting everything they want. Kids need some sort of structure to help them later on in life.

I have discussed the two extremes of parenting ranging from extremely strict to the careless parent. The most popular one that many parents choose to implement is the happy medium of the authoritarian style. With this the parent makes rules but can also reason with the kids. An example would be if the parent gave a curfew of 11 and the child came home a few minutes late due to the movie they were watching not being finished, they would understand and tell them to try to not make it a habit. If this was in the authoritative approach they would have gotten a punishment for arriving late and would consider it unacceptable behavior. Using this method will give the child a good understanding for the real world , yet won’t shelter them so much that they are shocked if something uncomfortable is presented to them.

All three parenting styles have their ups and downs. Have you figured out which one your parents used on you? Are you glad they used that method? Or wished they were a little stricter or loosened up some? All parents aren’t perfect but they use what they think will be best for their child. (680)